Friday, February 15, 2008

Muffin the Thug

Last night, in Taekwondo, Muffin was asked to kick a certain foam cylinder the Master was holding between his hands. She ran up, grabbed it with both hands and proceeded to kick it within an inch of its life while screaming at the top of her lungs! I was a little taken aback, but apparently this type of behavior is relatively commonplace around there. All I could think was "My daughter has a future in thuggary!" But the Master said that she did really well so maybe she'll confine her aggressive outbursts to the do-jahng (That’s "do-jo" to those of us who don’t understand why Taekwondo has to be different from Karate).

The incredibly sweet thing is that she turns around and beams a huge smile at me when she's done beating the crap out of something. She's really quite proud of her achievements, as well she should be. I'm just glad she's on my side.

She's up for testing next month and is pretty much guaranteed an orange belt. When I was asked by a lady who works for the do-jahng (we’ll call her Jane) if she had been registered for the test I told her that I didn't think Muffin was ready. Jane insisted that they are always ready and it's pretty much just a test to see if they follow directions. So, I drank the kool-aid and said "ok, where do I sign."

Turns out there is a $50 testing fee! Wow! Imagine that! Also, it turns out that the contract I signed with the do-jahng requires that I take a certain number of tests. Hmmm, really? I don't think that part was clearly explained - but it's my fault for not reading the fine print, right? Additionally, to drive home the idea that one is supposed to read contracts before signing them, I was a witness a certain interaction between Jane and a customer who wanted out of the contract.

He was trying to explain that his ship was going on deployment, that he wouldn't be able to come to class, and could he please cancel his membership. Jane explained sweetly that he would be required to keep paying for his membership during the six months and when he returned he could have six months for free. He was understandably bewildered and asked "What if I don't want to take Taekwondo when I get back?" The lady smiled apologetically and said that it was all written out in the contract and that he was obliged to pay for six months.

(Can I just say - I don't envy her job AT ALL! Who likes to be the person that enforces contractual requirements? Not me!!)

This went on for about five minutes. In the end, he asked to speak to the next highest level person and was taken away. They probably killed him with super secret moves and threw his body to the pigs, but at least now I understand why the Master was impressed by Muffin's thug skills! They are training an elite team of Tiny Enforcers to beat the crap out of people that don't adhere to their contractual requirements! Hey - at least my daughter has a future!


Unknown said...

awe, that is kinda sad that they are making him pay, I mean I understand it, but WHAT happens, God forbid if he doesn't come back. SEEMS for the situation it should have been waved.

yay for your daughter kicking major bootie though! That is awesome. I have been thinking of signing my son up for this for the same reasons (not kicking bootie, though that is pretty cool too) but to learn to use his aggression in a more positive way.

On a different note, how did you love Lost last night? That show has me asking, "what the hell" all the time.

calicobebop said...

Yes, it's also wonderful to have her good and worn out from all that enthusiastic exercise! She sleeps much better that way. :)

Lost was GREAT! I feel sorry for Sayid - he just can't catch a break with the ladies. :( Can't wait to see how this all unfolds!

Anonymous said...

Very funny! I am picturing your daughter beating that thing up and then smiling sweetly at you afterwards, all proud of herself! And that poor man being taken away to who knows what secret fate? Your description made me laugh out loud. Although I do think they could have made an exception for him, poor guy.