Friday, November 21, 2008

A Letter to the A-hole Behind Me

Dear Asshole In The White Truck,

I'm sorry that you are in such a terrible rush this morning. Really, it must be something quite urgent to cause you to ride my ass rather than take the two extra seconds to go around me. I chose this lane because I need to take an exit in a few miles and I have no intention of budging despite your flicker of high beams and fruitless hand gestures.


You see, I do not take kindly to bullying of any sort. Especially from the kind of person that drives an overly large truck to compensate for his puny little manhood. So, feel free to flip me the bird, flash your lights, whatever - I will continue to slow my speed in response. Yes, I'm that kind of a bitch. The more you irritate me the slower I will go.


I know you were grateful to finally get around me, Heaven knows I was grateful too! I hope we never meet in the highway world again but if we do I trust that you learned enough from this encounter to avoid repeating your mistakes. Next time you see my car in front of you it's in your best interest to go around me, otherwise I will likely come to a complete stop just to piss you off.


Sincerely,

The Bitch In The Black Accord

6 comments:

Colleen said...

bwahahahahaha!!!! sounds like my commute!

Michele said...

In my blog meanderings today I saw your PinUp. I have the same one on my blog. I love this artist.

Great commute post. I feel the same way.

Stacie said...

hahahaha, take that big car lil dick guy!

Mrs. G. said...

I am the kind of bitch who will tap on her breaks just to put a little hitch in their giddyup.

Michele said...

The artist of the PinUp is Glen Elvgren. There are a couple coffee table type books out of his work that are pretty cool. I picked one up on the bargain shelves at Borders the other day. Great stuff.

jenontheedge said...

I just can't believe those helpful hand gestures didn't encourage you to go faster.