Tuesday, November 4, 2008

How Desperate Am I?

So, I'm class all week and I have chosen a seat near the front (because I'm a dork) but also waaayyy over to one side so that I can be hidden in a corner if I need to dodge a question. Who was in college for nine years?!? I learned some stuff other than my major - that's for sure!

Anyway, there aren't that many officers in this class so we all pretty much scoped each other out in the beginning. There is superwoman (who actually makes the uniform look good), disdainful senior officer (too stuck up to socialize with us peons), dude with the glasses (who appears to have chosen the same seating strategy as me - except on the other side) and me - the chick in the skirt. The ONLY chick in a class of 64 people wearing a skirt.

After one of our breaks today the fellow with the glasses came up and introduced himself to me. We chatted and I managed to slip in the fact that I'm a single mom while he managed to slip in the fact that he's single as well. Anyway, conversation wound down as he went to get a soda and I went to the ladies room where I discovered that I was blushing. BLUSHING!

Yes, I had already mentally married us and was trying to decided if I like the way his last name sounded with mine. I don't know why I do it - but I always seem to be sizing up the men I meet for potential eligibility. I keep telling myself that I'm not in a position to date right now - that I don't even really want to date - and yet, I can not seem to help myself.

I consider all the options: attractiveness, potential prowess in bed, potential attachment to mother, ex-girlfriends/wives, willingness to share me with my daughter, willingness to work, etc. Before you know it I have sized him up and found him wanting. I have mentally married and divorced him. And he has NO idea.

Now I have to finish out the class with me feeling uncomfortable about breaking his heart while he's sitting oblivious on the other side of the room. Talk about awkward!


Madame Queen said...

Bwahahahaha! That's one of the funniest things I've ever heard, but truth be told, I used to do that too!

Unknown said...

ROFLMAO....I love you...and you are not desperate, you are just right.

AH, this post was so funny...no wait IT IS so funny!

Elle Charlie said...

I like that you not only mentally marry but mentally divorce. You cover it all.