Friday, February 5, 2010

Snow – The Do’s and Don’ts per Calicobebop

With yet ANOTHER big snow storm headed our way, I thought I'd put together my "lessons learned" from the previous storms. Behold!

Upon first hearing of a “winter advisory” DON’T keep reminding your co-workers. They get it and most of them aren’t nearly as delighted as you seem to be.

When the anticipated snow date is a few days away DO ensure that you have properly stocked your liquor cabinet. Screw the milk and bread – vodka is the real necessity.

When you are 24 hours out from a publicized snow event DON’T take the word of the weather commentator that the precipitation is going to be around 20%. They have no flipping clue and it’s better to be over-prepared. Refer to the previous entry.

Once snow fall commences, DON’T take it upon yourself to engage in sightseeing with your out-of-town relatives. Yeah, they may want to go to that special shop and yeah, you might want to show it off but the ensuing 2 ½ hour ride home does NOT make it worth the trip.

During your enforced confinement DO try to make the best of the situation. Six-year-olds get stir crazy – do something fun! Play some cards, bake some cookies, drink the vodka and everything will turn out alright.
The next day, DO take a few minutes (or more!) to take pleasure in the winter wonderland. That pretty white stuff will soon turn black and yucky – enjoy it while you can. Let the kids run off some of that pent-up energy. Take a nice long walk but DO make sure it’s after you’ve shoveled out your car because trust me, you won’t want to do it when you get back.

If you happen to be visiting someone who lives in a complex of some sort DON’T park in a nicely shoveled out space. The person who did all that work is going to hunt you down and cut your heart out be pretty miffed to come home and find that all of their hard work is now benefiting a complete stranger. Not to mention the fact that they will now have to find another space or park IN the snow. If you chose to disregard this warning be prepared for hate and discontent. I'm talking to YOU, Blue Honda!

That's about all I've got - any more suggestions? Muffin and I are well stocked and I'm hoping to have a few left overs from Breakfast Club as well. We've got all sorts of indoor entertainment lined up and I'm kind of excited - it will be our first blizzard on our own! We've always had company before. Stay warm out there!


hokgardner said...

My husband and the two big girls will be in the DC area starting Thursday, and the girls are hoping, hoping, hoping that there is still snow for them to see. I know people who deal with on a daily basis don't like the weather forecasts, but the Texas-born girls sure do.

Elliott said...

Ah, yes...the neatly shoveled space. Back in the prehistory of my life, I'd shovel my space since I left for work before the plows came through the lot. One night after shoveling a friend out of her lot, I returned home to find the neighbor's boyfriend in my space. I promptly shoveled the next space over for myself, ensuring that his wheel wells were solidly packed with the fluffy white stuff, and his entire car was covered.

Hey, I had to put it somewhere!

knittergran said...

Good luck with this storm. From what I'm hearing in the weather reports, it's going to be a whopper! We're getting rain and it's 34 degrees, so I guess we'll have ice before it's over. Off to the grocery store for me!
And thanks for the kind words about my losing my cat. Everyone has been really kind.

Barbara said...

We never get more than a couple of inches and the whole country grinds to a halt. I have nothing to offer you!

Kris said...

Sounds like you've got it all covered! Enjoy your weekend

Aurora said...

I know it's cold, but a part of me has long forgotten how snow feels against the skin. hollywoods rather dry these days.

MommyTime said...

Have a wonderful time! I am completely envious. We've had no snow to speak of this year, and I am pining for a really good storm. Play play play!

MommyTime said...

Have a wonderful time! I am completely envious. We've had no snow to speak of this year, and I am pining for a really good storm. Play play play!

dearheart said...

Good luck with the storm and aftermath! Your parking story reminds me of my days in Chicago when people would use old chairs and brooms as placeholders for their snow cleared spots.

Kate said...

People in Alabama need to follow these rules with just 2 inches of snow. People get insane with the snow.