Friday, October 10, 2008


Ok, I don't exactly know what this term means but I was exposed to it via the recent meme I completed. Does it mean that a blogger is not posting? Does it mean that a blogger is only posting about how terrible they feel about themselves? Does it mean that a blogger only posts about how awful their current situation is? What?!?!

I've taken a blog-break, I pretty nearly always highlight my flaws AND I do love to relay whatever recent misery I'm experiencing. Do I have this disease? Or am I a blog-hypochondriac?

I admit to feeling some guilt about posting more negative posts than positive posts. I envy those bloggers that can find humor in even the worst situations. Also, I'm incredibly grateful for the kind comments that I receive whenever I lay it out there. Here's the thing, my blog friends probably know more about the inner-workings of my life than my "real life" friends.

There is a certain anonymity associated with blogging that allows the blogger to be more inclined to relate their true feelings. Or maybe that's just me. Here's what I know to be true: I read a lot of very sincere posts and it impresses me. I am happy to believe that these posts are written by bloggers who are so confident that they would happily proclaim those same feelings on national television. But, I'm not like that.

I need to be strong in my "real" life. I feel the need to put up a front because of my profession as a "Naval Officer" and my position as a "Single Mom." These are my labels, they define me. I'm not saying that I don't occasionally (ok, more than occasionally) grump, bitch and moan to my family and friends - but, usually, they only hear the superficial bits. The deeper parts come out in my blog.

You know what? If you take a look at my very first post - truth via annonymity was not even what I intended this blog to be about! I wanted this blog to be about my journey towards organizational nirvanna. Along the way I developed an affinity with other "mom blogs" and felt comfortable expressing myself. I read posts by other mom-bloggers that made me think "ME TOO!"

I'd like to think that more than one person is in my boat. I'd like to think that I'm sharing a secret life of truth in a world of masks and white lies. This is my outlet! This is my free therapy session! Is it yours?

So, yeah. From time to time, I'm a Negative Nelly. And I'm grateful for my blog friends who allow me to be one. Thanks ya'll! I feel cured!


Matter Of Fact Mommy said...

calico, you were my first "follower" (which, granted, blogger only created, like a MONTH ago) and now i completely understand why.

i will go read your first blog post now. but have you read MY first blog post? i created this blog at the behest of some lady-friends of mine who read crabmommy. yet, crabmommy wasn't exactly "where it's at" for me. i mean, i like her posts and stuff and how she's anonymous and all that bullshit, but i wanted to be REAL. i wanted to PUT IT OUT THERE. i wanted to let anyone out there know WHY I HATE MY HUSBAND and every little issue he has.

and? my BFF, tara called me "so matter-of-fact" when i was in high school, and i couldn't help but come up with that moniker when i decided to start my blog.

Unknown said...

i hear you sista.

my blog is definately my therapy session...that is why at one time (I change layouts as much as I change my underwear...ok, I change my underwear more, but you get the point) my tag line was pull up a therapy couch. ;)

I am pretty honest on my blog, but I blog about things that I can't bare to burden my friends (in real life) with on a continual basis.

Hell sometimes I won't even blog it as often as I think it or think about it...I mean, I can't bore all of you everyday with my whining and wimpering.

SO I throw in some kid stuff and some whatevers...but always return to the "crap" posts. :)

Unknown said...

When you walk by somebody's yard, day after day, and in this yard they hang the laundry out to dry, after a while you get to know something about the people who live in the house.

These blog posts are just like that laundry. After awhile, a clear picture emerges of the heart and mind behind the posts. If you're disengenuous, if you're hiding yourself behind a facade, that will become obvious over time. The only way to survive out here is to be real. Or, at least, consistent. Happy or sad, Neurotic or entirely together, it all has to be here or it won't work. Be a fake, and you'll wind up talking to yourself. So just be you. And we'll be here to read you, listen to you, offer good, bad or indifferent advice, and we'll care about you - because by being real, you will have demonstrated that you care about us.

Manager Mom said...

Hey...I think you are entitled to use the blog however you want. And you are entitled to change your mind and rant and rave and bitch and smile, if it makes you feel better.

I think so many people start a blog for one reason (and I went and read your first post by the way). There's nothing wrong with using a blog to try to motivate you for weight loss or organization or that.

But I think blogging should be fun, don't you? and make you feel BETTER about yourself, not like one more shitty chore.

So take breaks whenever you want to, and write for yourself. And I wish you the happiest of days, whether you are writing, reading, or sipping a margarita. :-)

Shadow said...

i love blogging 'cause i can say what i feel. i can be me, the whole me and nothing but me, and i like that! and it doesn't cost 200 bucks an hour, like you say, heee heee heee

PorkStar said...

I agree with all of you, there's nothing wrong with expressing what you feel, positive, negative, etc. You own that space where you are the only one who rules it, if someone doesn't like it then, too bad. I recently started mine after going through major hell in my personal life and decided to make fun of all that crap that bothers me... and it's been fun just writing nonsense, even if i'm the only reader. : )
By the way, nice blog.