That would be my pets, my two cats. They've been with me for 14 years and I love them very much. Their real names are Louis and Zephyr, but I often call them other things such as Cheeze Doodle and Lou-burger. Their superhero names are Captain Frisky-Nibbles and the Bitching Kitty. See, Louis likes to nip at people when they neglect petting him and Zephyr likes to bitch and moan.
Louis is kind of a whore. Specifically, he is a lap whore. If there is a seated person in my house he will be in their lap soaking up as much love as he can. He is especially attracted to men, people that allergic to cats and people that are afraid of cats - but he's not too picky. He'll sit on anyone as long as they hold still long enough. If the stroking starts to slow down he will gently nip the offender's hand in order to remind them of their duty. He's very conscientious that way.
Zephyr is my baby. She has been my cuddle-bun for 14 years. She will snuggle under the covers with me at night and disdain anyone else who tries to pet her. She never "talked" much until after my daughter was born. Since then she has bitched and complained about her reduced status every day. Seriously, I wish I was joking. As soon as we come home she eyes Muffin and starts in.
"Merrrowww, merrroooooowwww, merow." (roughly translated means "Aren't you done with that hairless pink monkey YET?!? Get rid of it already!")
God help Muffin is she attempts to pet Zephyr - Zephyr won't have it. Zephyr gives her the stink eye and slowly skulks upstairs to lick her belly in frustration.
As you can imagine, after 14 years I've become very attached to my furry babies. Lately they have had some health problems and I've begun to fear for their mortality. I imagine coming home to stiff furry carcasses and it brings tears to my eyes. I fervently hope that I find them before Muffin does because I can not even contemplate the mental scars inflicted upon her if she found a dead kitty first.
Morbid much? Oh yeah. But, I'm not alone! A good friend, who's cat Lilly is the mother of my cats, frequently obsesses about her cat's mortality too. Also, Sarah Neilson recently wrote a post about her choice to adopt a new pug and part of that decision was determined by her dog Daisy's age and mortality.
I guess the reason I'm writing about this is because as of today they are both still with me but I'm not sure how much longer I have with them. This week the vet discovered that Zephyr has Cardio Myopothy - a degenerative heart condition. Louis has stones in his bladder and continues to suffer from bladder infections. They are both in decline - which I think is kind of a gyp because cats are supposed to live well into their 20's!
I love you, my little babies! You've been with me longer than most of my friends, providing love and support and only asking for the occasional (ok, frequent) belly rub. I'll miss you terribly when you go, but I won't let you suffer. However, it would be super if you could get a kitty modeling job to help pay for the vet bill! No? Ok, just lay in that patch of sunshine then - you've earned it.